


Your Name Is Stephen Strange

by druswriting



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universes, Coffee, Endagme? What Endgame?, Endgame can have some rights, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memory Loss, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Mutual Pining, Panic Attacks, Sort Of, because of tony's coffee addiction, fake memories, it's the third character, listen half the scenes are in the kitechen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:15:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23492305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/druswriting/pseuds/druswriting
Summary: Five times Stephen forgot what timelines he's in (+1 he remembered).
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Comments: 31
Kudos: 197





	Your Name Is Stephen Strange

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea in my head for so long, it felt so good to write this! I've seen the concept a few times, but I've never read a full blow out fic about it, and I wanted to so I wrote it.  
> Thank you @fandom-trashtm for betaing.

-1-

The first time it happened, Tony almost didn't notice. It’s a mix of the fact that Tony hadn’t slept in 35 hours or so, that he only came up from his lab to get more coffee and that he generally kind of disliked Strange. Lucky for Strange, the surprise of seeing him on the sofa of the Avengers Compound's common room, watching some late-late-late night show, makes Tony pay attention. 

It’s not unusual to see some of his teammates in the common room at 3 AM. Some of them are unable to sleep, some are woken up by nightmares, some are going on a jog for some reason Tony has yet to understand and some just lost track of time, like him. The fact that it was Strange, was well, Strange. It had taken him off guard. 

Although Strange had a room in the Compound, he barely hung out around the place. Even rarer was him sleeping over at the place. When he did, it was after a fight when he was too magic-drained to make a portal to his place and power-drained to do anything but pass out on the car the whole team took to the Compound and then pass out in his room. That was why it was weird that he was sitting on the sofa, not seeing Strange announce himself a day before. 

His surprise is what made him say, “Jesus, you nearly gave me a heart attack. And made the phrase Stranger Danger get a whole other meaning.”

Tony didn’t mean to start a conversation with Strange. To be honest, he didn’t like the guy. He was bad enough at first, with his cocky smirks and winks and cult-like rules but the fact that he likes leaving out important details didn’t make him more likeable in Tony’s eyes. So he really didn’t want to start a conversation with him, but it sort of happened on its own. 

Strange looked up from his show, to look at him, and rolled his eyes. “Are you ever going to get tired of that joke?” he said in a condescending tone. 

That made Tony freeze. As far as he remembered, he never made that joke before. But Strange commented on it as if Tony said it so much Strange was sick of it. But after he thought of it for a second, it was late. Maybe Tony wasn’t remembering correctly or Strange made a mistake. That made Tony shrug it off, unfreeze and head for the coffee. “Probably not,” he quipped.

“Hey, didn’t you quit coffee last month?” Strange asked, turning around to look at him.

Tony frowned. That certainly didn’t happen. “Uh, no. I might have quit booze like five years ago, but I doubt you would know about that.”

Strange frowned as well, “well, you should.”

“Thank you for the insight,” Tony collected the last of his coffee capsules and quickly hurried towards the stairs. 

Or at least he tried to do that.

Strange caught his wrist, “Tony, we have to talk about what happened last week.”

Tony looked down to where Strange grasped him tightly and shook him off, “what are you talking about?”

“I know you have been mad at me and you clearly quit quitting coffee because of it, but you can’t keep avoiding me.”

“I repeat, what are you talking about?” Tony was growing annoyed and frustrated. Sure, he was mad at Strange and tried his best to avoid him, but it certainly wasn’t last week that it started. He didn’t even see Strange last week. And when would he ever quit coffee?! 

Strange groaned, seeming frustrated as well, “pretending nothing happened? Real mature, Tony!”

“I’m not pretending nothing happened, nothing did happen, asshole!” Tony whisper-screamed. 

And then as he and Strange were staring into the other’s eyes with scorn… It was then that Tony realized something was wrong for the first time. 

His face became more softly confused instead of angry, his past with mental illness and feeling like everyone just thought he was crazy, making his voice understanding and calming, “Strange, you okay?” 

Strange rolled his eyes, “well, I’m kind of annoyed because you seem to be playing some weird joke on me, but yeah, I’m fine.”

“...Okay.”

There was silence for a moment, where they both seemed suspicious of Stephen’s behavior. And then Tony broke it by asking-

“Fri, what can cause false memories?”

Strange went rigid. 

“Sleep deprivation, trauma, and false memory syndrome,” FRIDAY answered as Stephen looked at him, horrified. 

“You okay, Strange?” Tony repeated, softer. 

Strange looked away from him and seemed to be thinking deeply, calculating. Tony didn’t say anything as he let Strange speak on his terms. 

“When did you last see me?” he asked at last.

Tony frowned, surprised by the turn the conversation had taken but hesitated while he thought about the answer to Stephen’s question. “I think… I think about a… I think it was somewhere around last month? It was when you helped Peter fight some B-list villain. I remember he was using magic with some artefact you took away to your museum of horror.”

Strange closed his eyes, his cheeks coloring slightly red. “Never mention this again, Stark,” he said coldly and then portaled away. 

-2-

Tony was half sure he dreamt or hallucinated what happened with Strange. Which was ironic considering what the incident with Strange entailed. But when Peter questioned him about the fact that Strange seemed uncomfortable when Peter brought him up during one of their study lessons, Tony knew it wasn’t a dream. He faked some lame excuse to Peter, not wanting Peter to be worried about Strange and inferring that Strange didn’t want people to know.

After having explicit evidence that what he remembers was real, Tony couldn’t help but be curious. His father always told him some saying about a cat that never really made sense whenever he was curious like that, but Tony couldn’t help it, it was in his nature as a scientist. 

He was mostly wondering what happened. Tony figured it was some kind of trauma, considering Stephen’s lifestyle and past, but he didn’t know what Strange was covering up for. What happened last week that Strange had to remember instead some fight with Tony? And why did he cover it up with a memory about him, of all people? And was he getting help? And who could know about all this? And could he find the information on the internet or by hacking into something maybe? 

The thing was, Tony thought this was a good opportunity to have a therapist come to the Compound to explain all of this. How to deal with PTSD, depression, anxiety and all that stuff. He knew several of the Avengers were suffering from one or more of these mental illnesses and it was a nice way to learn how to give help to those they trusted, so their teammates wouldn’t have to confide in some therapist they didn’t know. 

But Strange said not to mention it. So all of these ideas were just thoughts. 

Until the second time it happened.

It didn’t happen again until about at least a month and a half later, Tony figured it was because the incidents were rare and so were the times he saw Strange (only one of Tony’s figures were true). In all the times he saw Strange since the incident, even when he saw him in passing, Tony wanted to act a little kinder around him, but since he gathered Strange would hate that (Tony would hate that too, in his situation), he turned to be his usual asshole self instead. 

Today was no different. It was an Avengers meeting day, and Strange didn’t usually attend those unless there was something bleak he wanted to tell them, so seeing him there wasn’t a good sign. Although Tony always sent him an email to remind him of the meeting, so he may have just decided to come just this once. Either way, Tony decided to get into the usual snipping they did whenever they saw each other, seeing Stephen leaning against the Compound’s kitchen island. “Hey, Doc, long time no see. Decided we could use your wizard expertise?”

Strange glared at him, and all was normal. But then… then he laughed. “I told you I’m not a wizard. I’m a sorcerer.”

Tony was startled for a second by the sound of Strange chuckling at his hated nickname. Usually, Strange only did his original reaction. “That’s what I said,” Tony said despite his shock, walking towards the coffee. 

But before he could do that, Strange blocked his way. “I told you, your addiction isn’t healthy.”

Tony narrowed his eyes at him, “hey, this bit wasn’t funny all the other times and it isn’t now.”

“There’s something you find unfunny, that’s a first,” Strange teased, a smirk on his face. 

Tony smirked back unconsciously, but his smirk wasn’t as friendly as Strange’s, because of his scowl. “Yeah, and I bet you’ll find it unfunny when faced with my repulsers if you keep standing in my way.”

Strange raised his hands in surrender, “okay, I’ll give you your coffee but only if I get to make it.” 

Tony paused to consider before asking cautiously, “wait. Your cult doesn’t have a section in your contract that forbids you to make coffee, right? This isn’t your first time, yeah?”

“Haha. No, I’ve made coffee before, you have tasted it. And I’ll have you know that when I made coffee in my residence days, everyone loved it.” 

“I’ll need proof of that.” _He’s tasted it before? When? Did Strange ever make coffee for the Avengers and he just didn’t know he made it?_

Strange rolled his eyes, and it somehow seemed… like a fond rolling of eyes. “Well, you’ll have your proof in a second. Now let me make you coffee.”

And then Tony was pushed out of the kitchen, left to wonder about this weird exchange. Strange was never this comfortable with Tony, even if they bantered once in a while, it was always a bit strained. Maybe it was because Strange was vulnerable in front of him, Tony wondered. It seemed like too fast of a change, though. If something like that happened to Tony, he could probably never look the acquaintance in the eye again. Maybe he could logic it with science, however. Strange could be having a good day and the Oxytocin in his brain made him more talkative and cheerful.

Before Tony could over-analyse it, Strange handed him the coffee to judge, “I made it from scratch so it’s probably good.”

“As long as it does the job, I might not care about the taste.” Tony took the cup from Strange’s shaky hands that seemed grateful when he took it away (if hands can seem grateful) and Tony ignored the edges of the mug that were colored with dried, spilled coffee. He took a sip. “It’s good…” Tony said carefully, “but it’s also decaf.” 

“What?” Strange scoffed, “there’s no way that you can tell!”

“It’s not my first time drinking coffee. You wanted to make my coffee to trick me!” Tony accused.

“Obviously, I wasn’t intimidated by your repulsers,” Strange mocked and then smirked, “I could kill you before you could think of touching me.” He paused for a moment before smirking even wider, “well, depends what kind of touching.” Strange winked.

Tony pinked and looked down, not able to hold back a smile. He might not be fond of Strange but he was still smooth. Blushing and trying to hide it, Tony requested, handing Strange his mug, “finish making my coffee.”

Strange rolled his eyes, “fine. I’ll add the brain poison.”

“Thank you.”

They walked into the kitchen again, this time both of them allowed inside. Tony used his hands to jump onto the counter, sitting and making himself comfortable there. “So, since when do you come to these things?”

“What do you mean?” Strange gave him a questioning look, “you sent an email and now I’m here. By the way, that was a completely last minute email.”

Tony frowned. “Yeah, if the last twenty emails got lost in the net,” Tony quipped, “I mean I know mail gets lost but not emails.”

Strange grew silent for a moment, focusing on putting the caffeine inside the mug, which he seemed to be struggling with. “Well, my device is pretty old, and everyone knows that old email is the same as mail now.”

Tony couldn’t help but chuckle at the weird sentence Strange just said. Strange handed the caffeinated coffee to Tony. “So, are you coming on Saturday?” 

Tony tried to think about what Strange could possibly be talking about, before remembering that Saturdays were the days that Strange helped Peter with his homework. “I thought that was yours and Peter’s thing.” There was certainly no jealousy at his voice. 

Now it was Strange’s turn to frown, “maybe two weeks ago when you were too busy for family game night.”

And then it hit Tony again. The unseen before friendliness, the _flirting_ and the fake memories… it was happening again. Somehow, Strange had some trauma again, or he had that fake memory syndrome. Because this wasn’t the Strange with the memories Tony knew as well. 

“What, no comment about going along with Peter and calling it family game night.”

“There is no family game night,” Tony broke the news to Strange.

Strange looked at him funny as if concerned, “Tony, are you feeling alright?”

“Strange, listen, it happened again.” He thought of what helped Strange remember last time.”The last time you saw me was two weeks ago when I collected Peter from your Sanctum.” 

Strange made a confused face, “what do you mean... “ And then Strange realized the same thing Tony realized moments before, “oh.”

“Yeah,” Tony said awkwardly and an awkward silence fell. Strange stayed where he was this time, almost frozen in place and Tony wondered why he wasn’t running away like he did the last time. It was odd how still Strange was, almost thinking. 

Eventually, not meeting his eyes, Strange said in a cold voice, “I apologize for what just happened.” And then he walked away. 

But Tony wouldn’t allow him this time, catching Strange’s wrist, “hey, where do you think you’re going? There’s still an Avengers meeting, also would you explain what the fuck just happened?”

Strange looked back towards him and glared, “none of your business, Stark.”

“Well, it happened twice while I was here and your… your incidents seem to revolve around me so like hell it’s my business.” 

Strange took another tactic, choosing to stay quiet. 

Sighing, Tony realized getting mad won’t make Strange talk, so instead, he softly whispered, “look, don’t apologize… Whatever happened right now, I… I didn’t hate it.”

Strange looked at him and Tony could see a smile tugging at the edges of his lips. “Alright, I’ll tell you, but only if you agree to do me a favor.” 

Tony grinned triumphantly and agreed. 

Strange sighed, “remember in Titan when I saw all the possibilities of the future?” 

Tony grimaced at the words Strange said but nodded. He expected Strange to start telling him this was the first time he got trauma but instead-

“Well, sometimes I confuse the possibilities I saw with the life I have now.”

 _Huh?_ “Oh,” Tony said, trying to make sense of what he just heard. As he was thinking, Tony let go of Strange’s wrist. 

It made sense, in a way that didn’t really make sense to him. It meant that Strange experienced all the possibilities. Was it easy to get confused when you lived more than a dozen lifetimes. 

Then Tony remembered that he promised to fulfil a favor. “So, what can I do?”

“Whenever you realize something like this is happening to me, just say: your name is Stephen Strange, you’re alive, you are the Sorcerer Supreme and you’re single. You live in the New York Sanctum, and have a room in the Avengers Compound. You work in Kamar-Taj, teaching. Your friends are Wong, Christine, Cloak, and Peter. You spend the evenings with Wong, Saturdays with Peter and Sundays with Christine.”

Tony tried to memorize what Strange was saying quickly, but he knew he could always ask FRIDAY to play it back to Strange. He was shocked to realize this is the most he’d known about Strange since… since he met him. And it was all basic information to Strange. And some parts… did Strange ever think he was dead when he remembered one of the possibilities? Did he ever wake up wondering where the hell he was? Was there a universe where Strange didn’t have his emotional support blanket? It was all so terrifying, and Tony hated to pity Strange. 

After a few moments where Strange gave Tony time to memorize all of this, Tony broke the quiet. “I have a question,” he raised his hands, slightly mocking.

Strange rolled his eyes, “yes?”

His face turned into a shit earning grin, “is there a universe where we are friends?’

Strange groaned. 

“And one where you come to Avengers meeting, I can’t believe it! And what was that said, about _family game night_?” Tony gasped, “is there a universe where you’re soft?!”

-3-

Tony had witnessed Strange have many incidents like that happen to him after a few months. He was shocked to realize they actually happened often. It was strange if they didn’t happen at least once a week. But as he saw more and more incidents happen, Tony also grew more forgiving. He let go of the grudge he held on Strange for not telling him everything in Titan. Because sometimes, when Tony asked what happened in that universe, Strange’s face would twist with horror. Or sometimes, Tony would learn how bad things turned when Tony knew the future or anyone else knew the future. And then as he forgave Strange he also found out that... Stephen was sort of fun. They became friends, bonding over learning about each other’s worlds, their similar backstories, their banter and loving Peter and music. He even inserted his name in the section about Stephen’s friends.

It got harder and harder to see Stephen go through his attacks (he asked Stephen for the name of those attacks, and apparently attacks were the right word) as they grew closer. He saw Stephen embarrassed, confused, disorientated, hurt so many times, he could recognize the different facial features. He watched it happen so many times, that every time it happened it took him less time to recognize when Stephen was having an attack. He watched it happen so many times, he had to recite the reminder so many times, that he could repeat and quote the reminder in his sleep.

One time, he had to. 

Stephen had been staying at the Compound for the past few days and he had been… quiet. Almost disturbingly so. Tony had excused it to the difficulties of Stephen’s job at the time. Like when Tony wanted to be alone after bad experiences, maybe Stephen came to the Compound because he felt safer when he was around people, but still didn’t want to talk. He should have known something was up.

Peter was also worried. He was happy at first when Stephen showed up at the Sanctum, but when Stephen gave him a barely-there smile and then spent the next few days only reading in various places in the Compound, they both grew concerned. 

If you asked Tony, Stephen was acting a bit like he was kicked out of home. Tony always wondered if something was going on with him and Wong, and the whole situation got him thinking that maybe there was. He knew Stephen was single, but there was no reason Stephen couldn’t be in love with him, and they couldn’t have had a fight and Stephen couldn’t be heartbroken now. Tony doesn’t know because he didn’t bother asking. His curiosity made him have a few close calls, but in the end, Tony understood wanting to be left alone and not talking about his emotions. 

But Tony hadn’t expected it to be at 3 AM. 

Tony sometimes didn’t sleep. Or only slept through power naps. Or only stayed awake because of coffee. That week wasn’t one of those weeks. He had been working on something (for Stephen) but he needed Bruce for the job, and Bruce liked to sleep. Plus, he didn’t have nightmares for a while, and the meds he was taking were helping, so there was no reason why he wouldn’t sleep for a full 8 hours unless he was woken up.

Tony was a light sleeper, mostly waking up from noises or touches he didn’t recognize. Like the sound of Stephen opening the door and walking into his room and the touch of his gentle nudge at his shoulder. Tony woke up (maybe a better word is jolted awake) and almost hit Stephen in the face. 

“Oh my God, what the fuck are you doing here?” he exclaimed but then softened up when he saw Stephen’s scared face, “what’s wrong?” 

“I had a nightmare,” Stephen whispered, and it was the first time he talked to Tony in days. He sounded so small and vulnerable. “Can I sleep in your bed?”

Tony froze, trying to understand what was just asked of him. Stephen barely showed emotions like this. Barely needed comforting through touch and warmth and company. But now Stephen sounded like a child. He looked like he was scared and needed comfort, and Tony couldn’t turn away those beautiful, now grey eyes, pleading with him, no matter how weird the request was. He didn’t want Stephen to feel this way. 

Besides, his bed was massive, maybe they wouldn’t even end up accidentally cuddling in the night. 

As he was weighing the cons and the pros of letting Stephen sleep with him, he decided the pros outweigh the cons and scotched over for Stephen to slip under the covers. 

Tony could feel the weak heat Stephen was radiating as he got under the covers, and Stephen sighed as he got his extra warmth. He then faced the other way, so Tony was staring at Stephen’s back. Tony was overwhelmed by the longing to spoon Stephen for some reason but didn’t give in to the instinct, instead focusing on falling asleep. 

~~~

Tony woke up the next morning and found Stephen’s head next to his arm. He couldn’t help but have a little smile come on his face at how peaceful Stephen looked, though the smile quickly disappeared. He remembered that _Stephen was in his bed!_ His jerk of surprise and remembrance woke Stephen up from his sleep, which wasn't what Tony wanted. Sleepy eyes fluttered open and once Stephen regained consciousness, they stared into each other’s eyes awkwardly. Then Stephen moved his head back to the other pillow. 

“So… Do you want to talk about the last few days? Or about the nightmare?”

Stephen frowned, and spat out harshly, “what do you mean? I was acting normal all these days. And since when do we talk about our nightmares?”

It took a moment for Tony to realize what happened. “Oh, Stephen…” he whispered, thinking of the fact that Stephen lived another possibility for at least a day. He recited, “your name is Stephen Strange, you’re alive, the Sorcerer Supreme and single. You live in both the Sanctum and the Avengers Compound and work teaching in Kamar-Taj. Your friends are Wong, Christine, Cloak, me, and Peter. You spend the evenings with Wong, Saturdays with Peter and Sundays with Christine.”

Stephen seemed confused, as he usually did and then the realization struck him too.

He jumped out of Tony’s bed, “oh, God, Tony, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to intrude! God, you seemed so hesitant to let me in your bed, I shouldn’t have-”

“Stephen, it’s okay,” Tony assured him, climbing out of bed as well, “really, it turned out to be fine.” Tony wasn’t lying. Although Tony was a light sleeper, as mentioned, and Stephen clearly moved in his sleep, he never felt disturbed, uncomfortable or unsafe enough to wake up. It felt almost… natural. Sleeping with Stephen felt natural. Like it was when he used to sleep with Pepper. 

“No, it’s… it’s not fine,” Tony noticed Stephen started to shake, that his knees buckled, and his breathing became sharper, “I… I…”

“Hey, hey,” Tony kneeled next to Stephen, knowing that Stephen was having a panic attack, “breath, just breathe, you’re okay, you’re safe. You’re not there.” _Wherever there is._ “Shhh, it’s okay. Breathe in, breathe out.”

As Stephen was begging to calm down, he gripped Tony’s shoulders less tightly, and Tony knew the panic attack was over. “Thanks,” Stephen whispered, “God, I have to call Kamar-Taj, everyone must be really worried.”

“Wong came over a few days ago. He knows you’re fine. Well, as fine as you could have been. He probably told Kamar-Taj too.”

“Okay. Good.”

They fell into an awkward silence. What happened after attacks differed. Sometimes Stephen was fine, so he had time to stay and chat, and sometimes he left quickly. But Stephen never had a panic attack after an attack before. That was a first. And he was silent, too. Usually, if Stephen stayed, he also talked. But this time he seemed to be far away. 

“The snap was never erased,” Stephen said weakly after a few minutes where his breathing evened out completely. 

“What?”

“The snap was never erased in this possibility,” Stephen repeated, raising his voice. 

Tony was surprised. Stephen never explained what happened in the other universes unless Tony asked him to. And in this instant, Tony would never ask him to, and yet Stephen told him. He kept silent and let Stephen continue. 

“The only survivors out of the Avengers were you and me. I think… I think Pepper died too.”

Tony tried to pretend that didn’t bring a spike in his heartbeat. 

“You’ve gone a bit insane. The loneliness and all. You have made holograms of all the Avengers to walk around the Compound, be your friends. You acted like everything was normal. I think sometimes you believed it too. I hated the Compound. Felt like I was walking among ghosts. So I avoided you and you avoided me, that was the unspoken agreement.”

_Like before he got to know Stephen._

“But after the snap, a lot of the sorcerers disappeared too. And then a big threat came and we managed to contain it but it destroyed all the New York Sanctum and Kamar-Taj. After that the sorcerer kind of disbanded… they went their separate ways. We couldn’t rebuild.”

Tony winced sympathetically. He knows what it’s like to lose a home you love. 

“I had nowhere to go except the Compound. I hated it there. Didn’t talk to anyone because I knew there was no use. I barely even talked to you. But then you had a nightmare one night and asked the only person who could give you real comfort to sleep in their bed; me. And then… it became a habit. We slept in the same bed once a while, comforting each other but never speaking. Hating each other, liking each other, but never speaking about any of it.”

Tony nodded. He understood now why Stephen wanted to sleep in the same bed with him. Why he wouldn’t talk. Not even to Peter. “So did nothing ever… ever happen...?”

Stephen glared at him, “no, Tony.”

Tony raised his hands in surrender. 

“I guess walking into the Compound triggered it.”

“Stephen, that was five days ago.”

Stephen cringed, “I know.”

They fell silent again, Tony thinking about how Stephen had to live in this horrible universe for five days. This mental illness was starting to affect Stephen’s life. He started feeling guilty for not noticing anything and snapping Stephen out of it sooner. 

Stephen stood, “I need to go.”

“Okay,” Tony said but before Stephen could disappear, he squeezed his hand, comforting Stephen, “you don’t have to go, though.”

Stephen smiled at him and Tony knew the gesture was appreciated and helped give Stephen the comfort he needed. “I know.”

He walked away.

-4-

After this had happened, Tony decided enough was enough. This was affecting Stephen’s life too badly, and he needed to stop living like this. He rushed Bruce to make the meds for Stephen’s mental illness faster. Apparently, it wasn’t that simple, though. Because the lives Stephen was remembering were not fake memories, they were real ones that he mistook for the reality he was living in. And technically, this wasn't supposed to happen as long as Stephen had a sense of time and remembered what happened yesterday. Their theory was that the Time Stone messed up Stephen’s brain and made his memories become messy. 

Which was why they included Wong in their project. They asked him if he could erase Stephen’s memories of other timelines, but apparently, the memories were important. Wong helped in other magical ways though. They were making progress, but Tony hoped they could make it before Stephen has an attack as vicious as the last one and that he’ll accept the help given to him.

But that wasn’t the only new thing since that time in Tony’s room.

There has been this fluttering in Tony’s stomach when he saw Stephen after that. It wasn’t unpleasant, it was just… annoying. Tony knew what was happening and he didn’t like it. He didn’t want to get feelings for Stephen. Mostly because Stephen deserved better. He deserved someone who didn’t let him live in a horrific reality, someone who could understand what he was going through, someone who could always give him the comfort that he needed. Tony wasn’t any of that. He couldn’t take care of Stephen and that killed him. All he could was recite some facts about him. 

He knew these feelings were just setting him up for disappointment because even if Stephen would’ve wanted to be with him, he wouldn’t be happy. 

But thinking of Stephen’s serene face as he was sleeping, the look on his face when Tony held his hand (which he was pretty sure was faked because the squeeze probably hurt Stephen’s hand)... he wanted all that. But he wouldn’t have that. Otherwise, why would Stephen walk away when Tony asked him to stay?

However, he put his brave face on whenever Stephen was around, so he wouldn’t know that Tony was having his heart broken or that he had any kind of feelings for him. He willed the feelings to go away with no consequences for Tony to face. 

But it didn’t get better. Especially not after one of the realities Tony witnessed Stephen live. 

He walked into the kitchen one day to find Stephen in… a tight black suit. And he was with his back turned to Tony. Already a bad day for stopping his crush on Stephen. 

“Hey… nice suit,” Tony said. 

Stephen turned around and Tony almost blacked out at the sight of the white stripe down Stephen’s torso. But then Stephen rolled his eyes, “oh, it’s you.” He turned back around.

“And a warm greeting at that,” Tony said, “why the long face, Strange?” Tony asked, his long-running joke about Stephen’s face. 

Stephen glared at him, “nothing, I just hate it when Riri leaves her door open so her pets can run out.”

Tony knew exactly what was happening, but yet something made him pause and see what this reality is like. _Who’s Riri?_ His curious thoughts made him keep his mouth shut.

“What no comeback about how you have a mind of your own? That’s not very Tony Stark of you,” Stephen teased. “God, you make the hologram more life-like but skip all of the personality. That’s Stark Tech for you,” Strange grumbled.

Tony couldn’t keep his mouth shut for this. “Hey!”

“That’s more like it,” he muttered, “I have to say, when they told me they wanted to recreate the Compound, I thought no way they could pull that off, but they did a good job.”

_Who’s they? And why would they want to recreate the Compound?_

“I feel like I’m in one of Morgan’s VR headsets,” Tony almost decided he heard enough but then Stephen spared a glance at Tony, “you must be proud of your kid. I mean, not you. But he is. I am at least.”

Tony melted at the softness of his voice. “I have a kid?” he said, instead of reciting the old lines. 

Strange frowned, “no, Tony does. You don’t, because you are a fraud.”

Tony was hurt on behalf of his... hologram? He had heard enough. He won’t be getting any answers from this guy. He began reciting, “you’re Stephen Strange, alive, the Sorcerer Supreme, and single. You have rooms in the New York Sanctum and Compound. You teach in Kamar-Taj, that’s your job. Your friends are me, Cloak, Christine, Wong, and Peter, and you spend the evenings with Wong, Saturdays with Peter and Sundays with Christine.” 

This time, Stephen’s face didn’t light up with recognition as the speech ended. He just looked confused. Then his face twisted into realization, but it wasn’t the realization he was supposed to get to. “Fuck, you’re broken.” 

Tony frowned, “what? No.”

“Yes!” Stephen exclaimed, “you’re spewing wrong information about me.” 

“What? No, I’m not broken! I’m not a fucking hologram!” Tony fumed. 

Stephen ignored him, “God, Riri’s been through enough, she doesn’t need another broken pseudo father figure.”

“No, I’m not a hologram,” and to prove it, he grasped Stephen’s arms, “I’m alive. Tony Stark is alive!”

The solid hands on Stephen’s arms and the shouted fact made Stephen pause. And he slowly came back to normal.

And then burst into laughter. 

Stephen never laughed after one of his attacks. It was weird to look at Stephen’s laughing hysterically at the fact he could have been stuck in this state for days. _Wait, maybe he’s still in it!_

“You’re also not in the hyper-realistic VR headsets my offspring made!” that only made Strange laugh harder. “And… and uh… your name is Stephen Strange and you’re alive. And I’m alive. We’re both alive.” When Stephen laughed harder, Tony tried harder. “And you’re in the Avengers Compound! The original one. And you don’t know who Riri is. Well, you probably do, but you know I don’t know who Riri is. Or Morgan. I don’t even know either of these people’s gender.” 

Stephen didn’t stop laughing but between wheezes, he managed to get out, “Tony- Tony… (another laughing attack) I’m. ...I’m fine- fine.” 

Tony calmed down after that but then started to get irritated by Stephen’s laughing. “What’s so funny?” he snapped. He only tried to help Stephen.

“I- I thought- I thought you were broken!” Stephen let out another big laugh. 

Tony couldn’t help a tiny smile. 

Slowly, slowly Stephen started to calm down until only an amused smirk remained. Then he looked down, “what am I wearing?”

Besides himself and his mission, Tony blurted out, “keep it on, please” and winked. 

Stephen blushed a little. And the fluttering in Tony’s stomach deepened. 

“So, uh… I have a kid?” 

Stephen rolled his eyes, “of all the realities where the snap was reversed, this has to be the one I hate the most. And no - it’s not because you’re dead.” Tony pouted. “You used the Infinity Stones to snap Thanos away. You barely had time to say goodbye to your loved ones,” Stephen explained, but then a nostalgic smile came upon his lips, “but I have to say, Morgan is the best part of it.”

“What are they like?” Tony asked. He thought about having kids ever since he got together with Pepper, so curiosity on that topic was natural.

“Morgan is yours and Pepper's daughter. She’s… many times I’ve looked at her in those realities and she was so much like you. Loud, stubborn, sure of herself and amazingly smart. And when she grew up she was very beautiful. I think it’s partly because of Pepper, who’s stunning but… your eyes are a nice touch.”

Tony warmed at that. “You like her?” 

“I liked all your kids. Peter, Harley, Morgan, and Riri.”

“Wait, wait, you know Harley?”

“Yeah, he’s the mechanic of the New Avengers.” 

“Oh,” Tony said, thinking of the kid from Tennessee, “good for him.” After a moment of musing on how Harley would fit in the Old Avengers, he asked, “so who’s Riri?”

“She’s Ironheart,” Stephen explained, “you found her before the re-snap and left her in your will, your hologram and materials to build her Ironheart suit, that she only got when she was 13. The poor kid was ambushed. But she does a great job. I don't remember her talking much but when she did talk… it was whip-smart or sarcastic and in general something that you could have said.”

She sounded nice. “Do you think I could track her in this universe? I could use an heiress,” he asked, already preparing to ask FRIDAY.

“You can but… don’t. Let her live her life, Tony. It will happen eventually.”

Tony didn’t find that reassuring at all but decided not to look her up.

-5-

Annoyingly all of that made Tony’s feelings for Stephen even stronger. He was touched by how much Stephen loved his “kids” and how much he hated hologram Tony because it reminded him that Tony was dead. The fact that Stephen cared so much about him and his family, made Tony warm and a smiling idiot. 

Ugh. 

He still didn’t deserve Stephen, though. He selfishly didn’t break Stephen out of the other reality because of his curiosity, selfishly fell harder for Stephen because he felt sad when Tony died and he wasn’t good and smart enough so that Stephen could have his damn meds. He could never make Stephen happy. 

Tony never expected to be proven wrong. 

The day started like any other day. Tony woke up at a normal time (okay, maybe that wasn’t normal), made some coffee for himself and then-

Stephen came through the portal. 

Tony was startled and almost dropped his mug. “Jesus, Stephen, I have a heart condition!”

Upon seeing him, Stephen beamed and marched over to him. He hugged Tony as the portal closed behind him and, surprised, Tony wrapped his arms around Stephen in return. About a week ago, Stephen had told him was going to another dimension, which as a reflex, Tony despaired at. He didn’t expect Stephen to miss him so much upon his return. 

“I missed you,” Stephen said as he lodged himself a bit further away from Tony’s body, them still holding each other around the arms and then Stephen… kissed Tony. Tony was shocked at first, freezing up against Stephen but then, as Stephen continued to kiss him… Tony just melted into it, kissing back gently but eagerly, enjoying his first kiss with Stephen. Stephen poured so much passion and intensity into that kiss, that Tony was grateful for the fact a kiss doesn’t require any words because he was speechless. When it seemed like Stephen was about to pull away, Tony chased his lips, which made him kiss Tony earnestly once again. 

Eventually, they separated, having been breathless. 

“Wow, Tony said and felt, “I can’t imagine anyone missing me this much. Not that I’m complaining.”

Stephen smirked at him, caressing his face, “well, I did. I missed all of you. Your brain and your humor and your eyes and your lips and your butt.”

Tony chuckled and smirk, enjoying the compliments. 

“And I missed your recklessness and quirks and flaws and hyper activeness and the way you drink too much coffee and how happy you make me.”

“Wow,” Tony repeated, melting. “I want to have sex with you too,” Tony teased and Stephen playfully gave him the finger. “Isn’t that sad that this is the most romantic thing ever said to me?” he asked, honestly. 

Stephen scoffed, “I said more romantic things last week to you.”

Tony frowned, “unless ‘see you in a week, Tony’ counts as romantic, I don’t think so.”

“What?” Stephen frowned back at him, “I worked hard on seeing goodbye to you. Did you forget everything?”

Then Tony shut his eyes because he realized what happened and his eyes stung from tears. The world was too cruel with this one. “No, uh… you’re the one who forgot.”

Stephen looked confused, “darling, are you feeling okay?”

Selfish as Tony was, he was tempted not to snap Stephen out of this beautiful possibility. Because Stephen seemed happy and was with him and… Tony was happy. But the entertainment of the thought didn’t last long. Coldly, Tony recited, “your name is Stephen Strange, you’re alive, and the Sorcerer Supreme, and…. And you’re single. You live in the Sanctum and Compound. You have students in Kamar-Taj. Your friends are me, Cloak, Christine, Wong, and Peter. Weekday evenings - Wong, Saturdays - Peter and Sundays - Christine.” _But never with me_ , he thought bitterly.

Stephen usually has the same facial journey when he was told this - confusion\irritation, thinking, realizing, being embarrassed. But now the journey was more like - confusion, thinking, devastation and then-

Stephen disappeared before Tony could ask in a broken voice “there is a universe where we were together?”

-+1-

Tony hasn't seen Stephen ever since that day. He was happy to keep it that way. Although Peter claimed that Stephen liked him, Tony insisted, “just because he liked me in that reality, doesn’t mean he likes me in this one.” Peter just told him he was a scaredy-cat. 

The thing was, Tony was glad that he could make Stephen happy, but he didn’t know if the same thing was true in this universe. After all, Tony was selfish and dumb about everything involving Stephen. He couldn’t get his meds ready and couldn’t help him the usual way either. So Tony was happy to avoid Stephen until they could both put the kiss behind them. 

Which was why it was annoying, because Stephen showed up when he wasn’t ready.

Stephen knocked on Tony’s workshop door, obviously asking to be let in. Tony reluctantly let him in, figuring that just because Stephen would talk to him, doesn’t mean he would necessarily talk about the kiss. 

“Hey,” Tony put on a fake smile on his face, “how have you been?”

“Good,” Stephen said diplomatically, “how have you been?”

Tony gestured around his workshop, “you know. Mostly this.”

Stephen nodded. He seemed much more like Strange than Stephen to him right now; he was serious, reserved, seemed to be weighing his words. Tony didn’t like Strange. Strange looked around the workshop, at the suits he was making for Peter, the new nanobot suit he was starting to make and the Ironheart design he’s been toying with. And then he glanced at the different formulas Tony had laying around for his meds. “What’s this?” he asked. 

Tony stopped in his tracks of ignoring Stephen. He planned on the meds being a surprise. But apparently, after a kiss, secrets don’t exist. “I’ve been working on meds for you…” he said, coyly, “for y’know. The whole possibilities thing. So you don’t go around kissing people.”

Strange fell silent and awkward and Tony grimaced. “That was a joke.”

“Tony, we have to talk about the kiss.”

Tony turned towards Stephen, “no, please don’t. I know everything you’re going to say, and it’s fine, okay? So can we- can we just move on?”

Stephen ignored him, “listen, Tony, I value our friendship and I hope this isn’t going to change anything-”

“And there it is. I knew it. Okay, that's cool, now can you just-” Tony turned to look away. 

“-But I would like to try, if you’ll have me.”

Tony’s eyes snapped back to Strange’s, “what?”

“Do you… do you want to go on a date?” Stephen stuttered out.

“I thought… I thought you didn’t have any feelings for me.”

Stephen frowned, “why would you think that?”

“Because I showed you my true feelings and you started avoiding me like the plague.” 

Stephen quirked an eyebrow, “why would I avoid you if I didn’t have feelings towards you?”

“Well, of course I thought you had feelings towards me,” Tony didn't miss a chance to quip, “but I thought it was more like disgust, regret, embarrassment, hatred-”

Stephen glared at him, and then became tender and exposed, “that wasn’t it. I was… I was scared. I was scared that if we tried it, you would leave me exposed and hurting, because of the fact… the fact that I’m selfish and annoying and I have too many mental and physical illnesses to deal with.”

“Hey,” Tony stroked Stephen’s cheek, “ _I’m_ the hot mess. And I was the one scared. I want to make you happy, and I didn’t think I could do that.”

Stephen smiled softly down at him, “that’s not true. You make me happy on a hitherto undreamt of, Tony. And I think… I think we both have faults.” Stephen gave the coffee machine a stink eye.

Tony laughed at the private joke and the scorn towards Tony’s coffee habits, “agreed.”

“So?”

Tony mirrored Stephen’s fond smile, “I would love to go on a date with you.”

Stephen beamed like he did when he thought he saw his boyfriend Tony after a week without him. 

“Now, please give me a proper first kiss.”

Stephen smirked and obliged. 

~~~

The meds were working but not perfectly, and Tony and Stephen made their peace with it. The attacks were becoming less vicious and came only once in a while, and that was okay. But Tony still sometimes got to recite his favorite facts about his wizard. Though they changed a bit. 

“Your name is Stephen Strange-Stark. You’re alive, you teach at Kamar-Taj, and you are married to me. You live in New York, in the Sanctum and the Avengers Compound and your apartment with your husband and family. You spend your Sundays with your family and friends; Peter, MJ, Wong, Cloak, Christine and Pepper and their daughter Mary, Tony, Rhodey and your daughter, Morgan.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! BTW, Morgan is only the name of their daughter, I'm not stealing the character from the Pepperony fandom. Please leave a kudos or a comment, I appreciate those so much!


End file.
